The worlds way of showing us how simplicity is really the cure to a multitude of mislead souls, we’ve been stuck in the one track minded mental, brought to think that whatever anyone else is doing, we must do better, and boast about it through a façade of humbled behavior.. that’s not the wave… sad to say that we all get stuck in it at some point in time, it’s up to you whether you stay stuck in a circled drain mentality, there’s ups and downs to every situation; for we might not know why and how, we all get frustrated and perplexed. Yet in those moments most of us cling to the, what we’d like to call, “comfort”, of our emotions, and steering away from positive logic thought. Bringing yourself to terms, with yourself, being kind to yourself, things will occur that you’d never imagine, contentment will be in your favor. Keeping that faith, and discipline, is the hardest part; so it can and will be done, if pursued.
Moments come and go, there’s certain ones that remain, like living, taking care of responsibilities, and pushing past negativity on the daily.
Yet sometimes there are factors which could be anything, that make you tired, make you question your actions. They also make you happy, and make you cherish life just a little more than you’re “supposed” to. Those are the things that we tend to hold on to dearly.
I guess I can safely presume and say that all of us humans, we can get very selfish at times. It’ll leave us bumfuzzled with our feelings because we start to think that we’re not important to anything or anyone, which is what happens frequently. Plenty of times I’ve had to take myself out of that funk and push through a dark part of my life to see light again. It’s not an easy process, but it’s always worth it in the end.
The safest way to release your doubt is to have faith within yourself, even when you don’t feel loved or cared about by those you love the most. People have lives, we all do, sometimes I have a habit of forgetting that, and I’ll have to center myself with reality once more, but I’m human, we all are, we fall and we bleed, we aren’t machines.
The selfish part
In generality most of us tend to get selfish when we want happiness to ourselves, because we have found our very own pot of gold within our hearts, so we get jealous and gain attitudes that aren’t healthy. The most comedic part about that is we do it out of love and protection for ourselves.
My personal opinion, I don’t want to be happy with something that anyone can have. I don’t want anything common. It’ll get boring before I know it and poof, I’ll end up starting from square one again.
We want people to be there for us and only us because we know that we’ll do the same in return for them.
But what if that doesn’t happen ?
Honestly, I wouldn’t know the answer to that because I’m still trying to figure it out.
So what happens next ?
Life will happen, and I’ll be right back, to blog all about it.
Showing remorse can bring you to your knees, but I’d rather that be the case than to not have endearment for you. I’ve went completely numb due to the lack of love and brutality shown onto me; but you, oh you.
You bring me body trembles that keep me warm, instead of cold.
You’re everything I could’ve asked for and yet, I’ve come to terms that we both provide.
Come, the jazz sessions call your name along with mine
Stroke my strings, like the bass you call yours
Push your breaths on me and press my buttons like the trumpet you sing to.
Empower me, as I you.
Drink from me, as I you.
I promise, my lively liquids will keep you satisfied until you’re ready for more.
Thank you my love,
Someone once told me, in life, it’s best to just leave the negative thoughts behind and keep on trucking because there’s worse things that you’ll have to deal with. Subconsciously I’ve let negative thoughts run through my head and body, which reflected how I treated people, but I’ve tried so hard to become better, which I have; slightly.
Starting school soon, I’ve began to contemplate as to why I’m deciding to start a new chapter all over again. With veterinarian technician, being my number one goal, I’ve noticed that it was a passion I wanted to pursue, but not at the moment. I’ve wanted, and still do, to take care of animals completely; but somewhere in that mix, I’ve noticed that I come first. Me. As mean and selfish as that sounds, I’ve brought it to my own mental attention, that I’m young, and I won’t be getting any younger. If I don’t take care of what I need to accomplish then I won’t achieve any of the goals I want to acquire, then I won’t attain the happiness I want in the near future.
Which brings me to music, (my first choice), oh the flawless admiration I have for that word itself let alone the pure instruments that make it, what it really is. Nothing could ever bring me to loathe music, for its all I think about, for example, when I leave to a restaurant or even waiting on line at a store, I have to touch something and make up a beat, which progresses on to become a potential song in my head, which pushes me closer to successfully knocking down yet, another obstacle.
You see, I think about money a lot, but I also think about helping animals more than people. Because I’ve always despised individuals who don’t really care about the planet. They irk me in full honesty. Then there comes children, because they’re our future of course. Counseling came to mind. But then again, how can I help others if I cannot assist myself with my best interests to help those in need?
It all came back down to square one, which has taught me a very valuable lesson over and over again.
Your first choice? Let that be your decision.
I’d like to think of it as a juxtaposition to a drunk person.
Your first choice is something you know will make you happy, (not in many cases but so far in mine), and that second choice is something that you think will be better than your first choice but won’t really make you as happy as your first choice. Now let’s view the drunken individuals, when sober, they don’t spill out their feelings/thoughts/concerns as much as they would when they’re drunk. Because their second choice is to not say anything about what they really feel like saying. Although they know that if they were to bring up their honesty, as blunt as it may seem and or be, they’ll get ridiculed or misjudged for speaking up.
Now that, that’s out of the way, I’m proud to say that I believe I’m taking the necessary steps in my life for my future because it’s, well, it’s not the “right” thing to do, but it’s the smart thing to do. Who wants to be held up in a square town that is a dead end and not move forward ? My city, Elizabeth, New Jersey, is my comfort zone, but it isn’t my “home” for I know I love the parks, streets, and festivals as well as the locals I may recognize, but deep down within me, I know it’s not somewhere I see myself living for the rest of my life.
There are invisible walls that have been put up for those that seek the average things in life, as for me? Those walls have been torn down since the age of 15, furthermore, I believe it’s time I take a few steps over those broken down walls and feel the world out for myself and my future relationships and endeavors, for nothing, and, no one will be able to stop me.
Felisha Perez .
Love me down
Finish your plate
Don’t give me a frown
Come here to heavens gate
For the now
My waterfalls will make you weak
Certain strokes give me “WOW”
Come and let me make you tweak
While I watch you quiver after my love is given
I bask in my satisfaction of your surrender
This was wholeheartedly driven
My mentality and vibes are benders
I bend broken hearts and build them anew
Giving you my liquids from my fountain
Come sit next to me and enjoy the view
The view from skies to oceans to the top of a mountain
With you inside of me, I see your colors spring about
I grab your heart from inside of your body, to give it a kiss, just to put it back
Look me in my eyes so I can turn you out
I keep my clothes on to keep your imagination in tack
We can never lose ourselves in a drought
Our bodies must be flowing rivers of life
Come taste it
Fondle me like you would a fife
Put your fingers in the holes, filling them up, with no exit
And never leave
Compared to most, I’m pretty clever
Come to me, and receive
This gift I give you, that takes you to a different element
I promise I’ll be a good girl
I promise I’ll repent
Make me unfurl
I’ll make you wild
Happy, and intrigued with this game we play
Your smile will be bigger than a child’s
So speed up, I don’t have all day.
Meet me here then over there,
I’ll lick your spots
Just tell me where
Connecting them like stars that connect dots.
Come lay in between my legs,
You’re not entering, just simply sharing an intimate position
Talk to me like a puppy that begs
Let me be your physician
I’ll put you back into place
I can make you remember
Leaving long strokes of my tongue on your face
Then on your back that’s hotter than ember
But I’ll cool off, and so will you.
Come love me down,
Blinded by luscious words
A wish will stay thrown up in the air while getting slapped by the turd
Nothing is as pleasant as a beautiful night
Being able to trust your own might
Meaningless conversations bring me to a pause
Like teachers over analyzing a specific clause
Wishing you were a flower in my hand that blooms
Your lips and fingers feel like other women have been in your presence making me quiver needing to scour
Depressing laughs bring me to a realization
Your posionous licks cut my circulation
“Loves gonna get you killed but pride is gonna be the death of you and you and you and me and you and you and you and me and you and you and me”
Seeing such a scowl gives me reason to exit to sea
Bleeding for you, attaining knowledge of the ice in your veins
Keeps growing in my pains
Fingernails scraping your skin from love making that was too rough
While you fill me up with your slough
I’ll put happiness inside of you, by will or force
Putting you in constant jubilee without remorse
The three words that can make or break you
I love you, I HATE YOU !
Those could be the last words you spoke
My heart still obtains the holes which you have poke-d
Simple laughs and complex mind readings
That shall result in my beheadings
Of mind and soul
My Body could never be an option in this role
For it’s too strong to let you hold it prisoner
Although I’ve often prayed for a conditioner
For your aura
Because it’s harder than coral
Though I’ve cried
I’ve seen days better than this
I’m more than grateful for this ignorant bliss
For you think I’m not enlightened
But I am have knowledge of a plethora of things that can keep you frightened
Don’t push what you don’t know
Due to the soap opera also known as your show
I’ll be “blind”
Smiles cut deep
Innocent like the newborn sheep
Lions are not allowed to fall in love
Yet your silence grips me softer than a dove’s
They can never change
Well there’s possibility
But then there’s rearrange
I mean I meant
Meant to keep your heart safe
I’ll hold you in my armored arms my dearest waif
I’ll give you shelter something you’ll need
For it is not water you drink, but my lfe’s liquid I’ve sacrificed for you, so I bleed
I’m not ashamed, to show how I feel
Showing you a heaven is ideal
My soul become your wings, for they’ll give you strength to fly
For my love is never just simple, it’s conceived to multiply
I give you life, through me, take my hand allow me to lead the way
Things are subjective be that as it may
Sleep on my chest, allow my beating compassion to be your ticking clock
Perfecting your hearing when my lover knocks
Knocks on the doors to your heart
Follow me to clear waters of the dock so you may witness the reflection that’ll counterpart
Counterpart your heart, soul, mind and emotions
That’ll bring out my countless devotions
For your safety, and your piece of mind;
I promise for my sake and yours, that I’ll never leave you behind.
Have you ever felt like the world could be a crashing, complete demolishing, mess, but yet in that moment, you seem to notice how grateful you are. Those days are the ones where you have to grasp onto reality and see how fortunate you really are. People complain about the simplicity of life, without even realizing first and foremost, YOU’RE BREATHING !!!!!!!
You could’ve been dead, paralyzed, deaf, blind, injured, in a life changing disaster. But no, you’re alive. Take time to thank the universe for everything that you have, and what you don’t have. I know that second part sounds funny, but honestly, ponder on that; you possess what you need, most of the time it’s not the things you want, which I’m more than sure it can be frustrating, but if you’re in the middle of getting yourself together you can’t focus on what you’d like and want, you’ve got to stay hungry for what you need in life to remain alive, and most importantly humbled. Furthermore you have to show thanks, because everything you obtain, can be taken from you like a rug being pulled from under you.
One beautiful day, someone will be rude to you, someone will hurt your feelings, and at a certain point and time, someone will break your heart, so it is your JOB as a human being, to remain calm and take advantage of the glory which, if you haven’t noticed, is all around you.
Let’s use it as an analogy.
The trees get rained on by the sky so many times a day, a week, a month, even more during a year, and yet, they don’t decide to break away from their roots firmly planted in the ground, instead, they grow, so beautifully. Doesn’t that make you want to cry ? They keep their head(branches) up and continue to look at the bigger purpose/ picture.
Growth will make you better, every single day, you just have to push yourself to that very point.
So when you’re having a great day, noticing how blessed you are, in that moment, give thanks, to the
- And to yourself
I say yourself because, you can give up at any given moment. You really can, but if you know that you want more out of life, and you yearn to be content with life as well as yourself, you continue to push, and let me tell you something, it’s HARD ! So hard, that you want to cry or get so aggravated that you want to storm out and walk off of the edge of the world, but think about it………
the same energy you put into quitting is the same energy you should apply to winning and happiness. Because you deserve that . You deserve the world. If you work for it.
So if you’re happy today, stay like that 💚.
Correct me if I’m absurdly wrong but, relationships… aren’t they supposed to help people grow ? Isn’t it something that you’re supposed to hold dear and close ? Isn’t it something like let’s see …. oh .. wait.. that’s been ruined for decades, let’s be real, today’s relationships have gone to shit. One person believes they’re in love while the other is off not paying attention to the one they have at home because they’re not who they actually thought they were or because it was all lies and fake relations .. it all comes back to being true to who you are .
WHY ON EARTH would anyone ever lie about themselves ? Why on heavens grounds will there be an actual person acting or pretending to be who they are not ? This is exactly why there’s so many problems in this world, lies… they’ve got to stop. It’s like you’re false advertising yourself and expecting to end up happy after you show your true colors …
People have lost the value of humanity and self respect. You’re supposed to be proud of who you are and loyal to who you are, why would you want to have it a different way ? What because you’re fantasy is somehow going to be your reality some day ? It’s not going to happen like that. Never will for the most part. If you work hard for yourself, allow your money to work for you instead of you working for your money, find who you are in your very own universe and mind your business when other stuff that happens doesn’t pertain to you, maybe, just maybe, you’ll be able to live a happy life.
It’s like too many people get a rush of feeding off of negative energy and it’s driving me nuts! But one thing that I’ve noticed as well, stereotypes have been a big role in today’s society, skinny people want to be thick and thick people want to be skinny, obese individuals call themselves thick now, and we’re all supposed to live a jolly life while we see armageddon happen before our eyes. Laying down everyday and not doing anything has been the new “hobby”. Social media is being used for gossip and hatred instead of research and knowledge. It’s like everything is backwards.
Insecurity has got to be the number one illness in America… in the world in fact. There’s a cycle, or maybe let’s think of it as a flow chart shall we ?
Insecurity leads to
Jealousy which leads to
Self doubt, which leads to
Bullying which leads to
Spreading your negativity through others
Which leads to a slow death.
Remember what I said about worrying about your own and minding your business? Yeah it plays a role here too.
People hate just because it’s like every person they see, they visualize some kind of part of themself that wants to be like someone else, as well as not loving themselves enough finding it easier to pick on another person for being themselves just so they can feel much better. And it’s all because of course once again, society, due to the fact that is has made it better for others to believe that being the next this or that will get you places when in reality, you’re just another copy waiting on the food chain to get eaten up by negative comments or fake fans that “track” your every move. Who wants to live a life like that ? Constantly in someone else’s mouth or mouths, my father has always quoted Bruce Lee (his idol) and he said “Showing off is the fool’s idea of glory”
So, I guess that’ll explain everyone’s gold plated jewelry claiming that it’s all real gold? Or showing all the money that you have on social media and then crying broke because you got robbed or spent it all ?
I want to live a life not away from people but away from society’s rules. They’re stupid, they superfluous and down right excuse my expression, retarded.
In high school there was a guy who had Down syndrome in our school. Very out going and extremely talkative, but I loved it, the kid had character I mean, you can’t blame him for being himself, fully and faithfully. He was literally all he had in that school besides me and a few other peers and teachers. But of course, insecurity kicks in, the jocks, even losers and loners picked on him, senior year came around and he was so excited to graduate, but he didn’t walk, hell, he didn’t even show up, parents were there for him and everything, unfortunately 2 hours later, his mother had to find out through a horrifying missed call/ voicemail that her son took his very own life because he wasn’t “good enough” now listen to this,
I remember a friend of mine had a daughter and was so upset because her daughter has Down syndrome which led me to believe that she was ashamed, I then proceeded to ask her why was she so upset, she answered in a barbaric tone, “my kid is stupid alright? She’s slow, she’s a liability, I can’t live like this.” Three years later ended up loving the child to death, I now ask her, how’s your little angel ? She answers “oh you mean my little big Einstein?”
Moral of that story is, people that pick on others are the ones that you really need to watch out for, they’re so scared of being who they are because of society, it’s almost as equal as committing a sin, if you’re not with the “in” crowd. I find the total thing to be a pure cimmerian hell. Who wants to live like that ? No one.
The long strokes of your index and middle finger send chills down my spine, after it’s all done, conversation is something I become addicted to. Your mouth filled with so much honey, while my mind pursuades me to take a lick to share your taste. There’s nothing better than this. Your imperfections speak so sensually to me, making it extremely difficult for me to pin point as to how they’re not good enough for you.
I laid here expecting so little, instead I’ve received so much more. This position here is where I’d like to stay for the rest of the night. Your brown eyes giving me a reflection of my own. There’s nothing that I could desire any more than this. I appreciate your company, in fact I’ve yearned for it for far too long.
But answer me this, are you used to the caresses I’ve been handing you ? Does it feel like home ? Will you be able to see my woman like chest as your safe haven when you’ve had a bad day? Are you comfortable enough to lay on it and tell me your hopes and dreams ? How can I make you feel safe ?
My body becomes your office of therapy, for all I know you’ve accepted others. The only difference is they’ve looked for security through you, while I offer you my own secure essence of safety through my arms and my soul.
I see your chest as something to lay my hand on. The heartbeat through your ribs have given me such a deep sense of withdrawal. Withdrawal of love and peace. I’ve longed to bring tranquility to you, but only if you let me .